Christmastime for the Jews

Ok listen up because I'm about to, in the parlance of Charlie from Always Sunny, crack an egg of knowledge all over you. Some of you probably know a lot of this stuff already, and others of you I've talked to about it. But it wasn't until this morning in the shower that I realized why I find it such an important message to spread. And here it is: Christmas has nothing at all to do with Christianity or Jesus….historically speaking. As a culture we have chosen to forget this. The following is taken from the History Channel's website:

The middle of winter has long been a time of celebration around the world. Centuries before the arrival of the man called Jesus, early Europeans celebrated light and birth in the darkest days of winter. Many peoples rejoiced during the winter solstice, when the worst of the winter was behind them and they could look forward to longer days and extended hours of sunlight.

In the early years of Christianity, Easter was the main holiday; the birth of Jesus was not celebrated. In the fourth century, church officials decided to institute the birth of Jesus as a holiday. Unfortunately, the Bible does not mention a date for his birth (a fact Puritans later pointed out in order to deny the legitimacy of the celebration). Although some evidence suggests that his birth may have occurred in the spring (why would shepherds be herding in the middle of winter?), Pope Julius I chose December 25. It is commonly believed that the church chose this date in an effort to adopt and absorb the traditions of the pagan Saturnalia festival.

Funny isn't it, that people complain about the commercialization of Christmas when the holiday itself was a marketing campaign from the start? A lot of Jews hate on Christmas (Lord knows I hate on the gawd awful music), or at the very least feel left out around this time of year. And there's something sad about that because what was once a beautiful festival celebrating nature has been confiscated by the Church, leaving non-Christians and atheists to recognize it as a day off of work and little else. It's time to recognize this time of year for what it is, a holy transition point in our year, a day from which all days will begin to get longer, and a holiday that a man in a funny hat once proclaimed to be the birthday of the son of God. Don't let anyone rob you of the true meaning of Christmas or of anything else. Because the further we stray from our Mother Earth, the easier it is to destroy Her.

And I guess what I'm really trying to preach here is not so much that we all learn to recognize this holiday in our own way, but that we all learn to question things in our lives more. On the whole I see a major lack of creative and independent thought in our culture today. I believe it to be a very healthy thing to question everything worth questioning, everything not worth questioning, even your own thoughts. These upcoming years are critical to our survival and evolution as a species, and if we want good things to happen we have to make them happen. We are immensely more powerful and creative than most of us give ourselves credit for.

Many blessings to you today and for the upcoming year. Peace, love and light.

"You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is"

Do The Evolution

I’m not sleeping well lately. Ever since my final plans for Burning Man have started to come together it’s a struggle to get through the night. This has been over a year in the making, since I met my Burning Man friends a few weeks before the 2008 event was to take place. Looked at from another perspective, it’s five or more years in the making, from the time I first heard of it and knew, maybe not consciously, that I would end up going one day. Looked at from yet another perspective, it’s almost 30 years in the making. My life has been leading up to this in many different ways.

During Rubee’s pre-yoga discussion yesterday one of the other participants mentioned that he’ll be going to Burning Man. Afterwards I spoke with him and he talked about how he likes to pick a theme or intention for himself each year, something to align his experiences toward. I liked that idea a lot. Working with intention is something I’ve been thinking a lot about, and it’s certainly something that helps enhance a yoga practice. It didn’t take long for me to come up with my intention, because it happens to coincide with this year’s official theme: Evolution.

This ridiculous corporate song and dance cannot continue for much longer. I have to find another path, a way to serve. Someone mentioned something at Rubee’s class about being unhappily employed, and Rubee polled the class to find out who else is in that situation. I of course raised my hand along with a few others, and Rubee of course had to interject his beliefs about happiness being metaphysically negative, and so on (don’t get me wrong here, I love the guy, just poking fun). That got me thinking. It’s not that I want a job or career where I’m happy and fulfilled 100% of the time. I’m pretty sure that’s an impossible dream. What I really want is a job or career that I find to be relevant. My job right now holds no relevance toward the state of humanity. Not that another insurance job, which I have been seeking out, would, but at least I could be more challenged and excited during the day.

But what it feels like my life is opening up to is a way to serve humanity. I just checked out another fascinating book from the library, one that picks up logically where Anatomy of the Spirit ends. It’s called Your Hands Can Heal You, and one of its authors, Master Steven Co, will be in Chicago next month. I found out about him and the book from the most recent issue of The Monthly Aspectarian, a free local publication that I haven’t read in years. On a whim (or was it something more?) I picked up a copy from the yoga studio the other day.

There’s a life force inside of each and every one of us that is capable of astounding things. I don’t believe that I have it any more than anyone else has it, but what makes me different is that I believe in it and its powers. And I want to learn about how it works and what it can do. Yoga is a technology that uses it for personal development and growth toward enlightenment. But in that sense yoga is sort of limited. Being a yoga teacher and guiding people along this path is interesting and fulfilling to me but I want to explore other areas. Do I need to find a guru, or a master of some kind to study with? What is my life evolving toward? This is intention for my first Burning Man.

Letting Go

I haven’t written in a while and wanted to just poke in and say a few things. This morning I started the day off with sunrise yoga on the beach. Michael was the teacher, and the place where it was held is so serene and beautiful. The sun hung out over the water and the whole thing made me think of Burning Man (which I leave for in a week and a half!). While I didn’t get to see the sun come up over the horizon, I can tell it’s true what they say about sunrises being much better than sunsets.

I’ve been thinking more and more about surrender and letting go. My friend Noah had a great quote, non-attributed, on his facebook page the other day. It said “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” So wise. I’ve come to know this as I’ve come to know many things, not just intellectually but with my whole body; my bones, my blood, my flesh, my cells. They say that yoga changes you on a cellular level and I believe it.

Forgiveness is a form of letting go, something people are not very good at in our society these days. And it’s also something I need to work at, even though I’ve made huge strides in this area. Yesterday I was able to let go of my dissatisfaction with my job and just do the job that I’m being paid for. And it ended up being a very beneficial, almost meditative experience. Today I’m having a harder time with it but that’s mostly due to a change in some plans that is stealing my attention.

Two other brief things: yesterday I was approached by Justin, the owner of Windy City Crossfit, about teaching some yoga there. I’m both excited and nervous about the opportunity. People at the gym will really take to it I’m sure, so I need to make sure I’m prepared and don’t let anyone down. Second, I’m reading a fascinating book that found me the other day when I took a moment to stop in a used book store on my way from Eli’s wedding festivities to dinner for my grandmother’s birthday. It’s called Looking Into The Invisible by Omraam Mikhael Aivanov.

Gettin My Reps

Bill Simmons, also known as the Sports Guy on espn.com, always talks about athletes getting their reps when referring to the experience it takes to rise to the next level. For example, this most recent playoff loss by the Bulls was indicative of the fact that they just need to get their reps. They need to play together for longer as a team, and build that strength and cohesion that comes only with experience. I, as a beginning yoga teacher, need also to get my reps.

It’s starting to happen for others in my class. One of our requirements for course completion is to assist in 3 classes. I haven’t done any yet but I was speaking with my classmate Amy about a class she assisted the other day where a woman she was adjusting in a forward fold actually fell over and did a somersault. It freaked Amy out—the woman appeared to be fine—but she realized afterwards that that kind of stuff is bound to happen.

There are any number of situations or occurrences that can take place in a yoga class, or questions or challenges that students can throw at you. And no matter how much training, learning, reading or practicing you’ve done on your own, you won’t learn what it really takes to be a good teacher until you step into the driver’s seat and lead a class. This is why I’m both excited and scared for this Sunday when I lead my first class.

The format will be a community class, which is a free class open to whomever would like to come. I’ve decided not to extend an invitation via facebook or anything like that. I’d rather not have the added pressure of having people I know as students. It might relax me and give me more confidence, or it might have the opposite effect, so I’m going the safe route and not making it public.

I wanted to have my class plan done weeks ago so that I could run through it multiple times before the date, but with studying for this past Sunday’s test and other things I’m just getting around to it now. The plan is complete; I just need some victims to teach it to. Since tonight is our last class, which will actually be dinner and drinks, and Wednesday is the Burning Man meeting, I won’t get a chance to work through it until Thursday. I may only get 3 dry runs, but that should be enough. After all, it’s not like these people can complain about a class that they didn’t pay for. At the same time, I want to do my best.

Most importantly, I need to keep the momentum of this yoga experiment going. This is a critical time for my yoga career, and I wish it wasn’t coming in the midst of Burning Man preparations, but that shouldn’t be a big deal. I’m trying to learn from the mistakes I made in my insurance career, which mainly stemmed from not being invested in its direction. I have a great opportunity to seize on here: yoga is growing in popularity, I am fresh out of a training program, and I’m young and enthusiastic. There are opportunities if I’m only creative and opportunistic enough.

One thing I need to reexamine is the idea of teaching yoga at my gym. Crossfit is not a full-service gym. They offer kids classes but other than that it’s just core Crossfit programming and nothing else. Justin, the owner of Windy City Crossfit, expressed interest in me teaching some yoga back in March when I asked him. I’m going to revisit this. I offered to do it pro bono, just so I can gain experience. I just did a quick Craigslist search for yoga jobs in Chicago and they all require previous experience. But those are for the ones that pay. Luckily I can support myself in other ways for now, so I can afford to teach for free and build up a resume.

To my 3 readers I’m asking, please offer any suggestions on resources I can use to get my career going. At this point I think the idea of teaching for free to gain experience is a good route to take, but there are other ways I’m not considering and I’m open to your input.

AcroYoga and Living For Today

The final exam for our yoga training is coming up on Sunday. Receiving a passing grade of 70% or better is one of the requirements for successful course completion. The test will require a lot of memorization of various things, many of which I’m comfortable with, but certainly not all of them. Amy gave us a choice in class on Saturday to either review test materials with her or to attend Tatiana’s acroyoga workshop. Three of my classmates and I went to the workshop while the rest stayed and reviewed, and I am quite happy that I made the decision that I did.

Tatiana has incredible energy surrounding her. She is a super advanced yogi and her classes are intense but lively and lighthearted. She doesn’t take herself too seriously. In her workshop we worked on partnering exercises, the most exciting of which was the airplane pose. I had several opportunities to be the base and the flyer, and I’m pleased to report that I was never dropped nor did I drop anyone. It was such an awesome feeling to be up in the air like that! I also learned a few massage-type things to use as well that feel really good. I would like to maybe pursue a training program in massage therapy. I love making people feel good.

The lesson I took from the day though was just as beneficial. When Amy gave us the choice, it didn’t take me long to make the decision. Of course I want to pass the test, and I would have benefited from a review, but having a unique experience is more important to me. Seen from this perspective, it’s all about the difference between goals and intentions. Let me explain. Often at the beginning of class a yoga instructor will invite his or her students to set an intention for the class. This was always a little confusing to me, so when I found an article on the topic on Yoga Journal’s website I printed it out and read it. What the article explained was that an intention is not the same as a goal. A goal is a future oriented thing, for example, I want to get a promotion, or I would like to be able to sit in lotus. An intention is focused on the here and now: I want to be more present or mindful; I want to have more compassion; etc.

So now I look back to my intention for starting the training program. Was it to pass the test and successfully complete the training? No it was not, however it was my goal upon deciding to do the training program that I would like to receive my certificate. On the other hand my intention, or one of my intentions, was to try new and unique things. All this stuff wasn’t going through my head at the time we had to choose. Instead what I thought was, in 10 years I’m going to remember this workshop but I’m not going to remember reviewing for the test for two and a half hours. The fact that my thinking mind was present enough and plugged into my intention in this way is proof positive that the yoga is working for me and helping to change me for the better.

Untitled

I had another great commute this morning. I drank the yerba mate upon getting out of bed and listened to Van Morrison’s beautiful devotional music on the train ride. What is this amazing feeling I have in the morning that seems to trail off by the early afternoon? Sleep is a reconnection with the mysterious void, the collective unconscious of which we are all a part. This is why children are such magical beings, because they are only briefly removed from the unknown, these unformed blobs of energy working to understand and make sense of the reality that they’ve just recently entered. Many friends of mine are becoming parents for the first time and I’m getting to hear about their experiences and it sounds so amazing. I’m coming to realize that I do want children some day.

The hours after sleep are different from the hours later in the day. We’re shifting between worlds and reconnecting constantly it seems. In the morning my heart is so full of love. I want to teach yoga or volunteer or do something to serve God and my fellow man (see my entry below about service). But come the afternoon, after having spent hours (or depending on the day, minutes) doing pointless paper pushing, I just want to relax and eat and hang out. This isn’t always the case but it happens, especially on those frigid winter days we get here in Chicago.

What provides happiness to us as humans? Beyond material things, like money, because everyone likes money, or even good food, company, conversation, love. Having a partner in life is important and certainly makes life better but many married people are miserable. The happiest people have something to sustain them from day-to-day, moment-to-moment, a purpose to live for. A career can provide that and certainly does for many people. But the happiest people I can think of are those who have a strong connection and relationship with the earth; surfers, skiers and snowboarders, climbers, divers, and yogis.

The earth is more than just our home, more than just a rock spinning around in space, for us at least. This is going to be difficult to describe but I’ll do my best. To me, humans and all other life on earth are a manifestation of life energy as reflected by the earth. It’s as if the planet were trying to evolve to a higher state or plane of existence and it created life in order to do so. Study the human body, not just our gross anatomy but our energy anatomy, the chakras and nadis and so on, and you will be fascinated with what you learn. A woman’s cycle is coordinated precisely with the movement of the moon. Our major religious teachings throughout history describe paths to enlightenment that are correlated directly to personal and spiritual growth in our bodies. Can this stuff really be coincidence? “As above, so below”, the old adage reads.

This is why endeavors like the ones I mentioned are so addicting. People get a taste of what the earth can give through these activities and they just want more. Here I am sitting on the 20th floor of a tall building in downtown Chicago, typing on a computer and mostly removed from my spiritual mother, the earth. But in a few hours I will be on a yoga mat recreating that connection and furthering the relationship. It’s such a beautiful thing to do, and it has benefits for the practitioner and, in my opinion, for all of humanity, that we may never know. Just as our false actions-- lying, cheating, stealing--all have far reaching effects that we cannot grasp, an offering of a yoga session does the opposite.

I wasn’t sure where I was going with this post when I started it, and so I’m not sure how to end it, except to say that I love being alive, and thank you for reading.

Non-Attachment Is The Key To Freedom

I neglected to meditate this morning. And yesterday, and the day before that. But the day before that I did meditate. I have yet to establish a consistent meditation practice, or a consistent yoga practice for that matter. But what I’m coming to realize is that it’s not important to attach myself to a certain style of yoga or meditation, or a certain schedule, because ultimately life gets in the way and won’t allow a strict adherence to such things. What’s important is that I stick with something and have compassion with myself, since non-attachment really is the key to freedom.

Even though I didn’t meditate I was still in a very mindful state on the train to work this morning. It could be due to some mushrooms I ate before the Dave Matthews concert on Saturday. Lately it’s been hard for me to have a good trip, although that could be due to the strain of mushrooms I’ve been eating. These ones were from a fresh new batch, and they hit strong and hard. Good mushrooms really clear away the mental cobwebs for me. Used wisely they can be powerful tools for enlightenment. It could have been the mushrooms or the good nights sleep I had just had or the yerba mate I drank when I woke up which always makes me feel calm and energized at the same time.

Whatever it was, what happened on the train was that I noticed my mind creating certain familiar thoughts—being annoyed at a woman putting on makeup, seeing a man wearing a nice shirt and reminding myself that I really want some new clothes—but then I just let them go and returned to my breath and the music that was playing on my ipod. It sort of helped that I was listening to Fela Kuti for the first time ever, and aside from the fact that it was really good music, the fact that it was brand new music to my ears might have helped me turn away from the thoughts more easily. This state of being able to sort of watch your thoughts like clouds passing overhead is the goal or intention of meditation.

What was so amazing on this brief train ride was the sense of freedom that I felt. Normally I would have gotten caught up in my annoyance at the woman. I would have continually looked at her and been more and more annoyed. Or I would have looked at the man’s shirt and thought about the shirt I am currently wearing, about how it’s a great shirt but it’s not perfect because the shape of the collar is awful, and about how it’s such a shame that I have great fashion sense but never enough money to invest in nice new clothes that fit properly since I lost the weight. And around and around it would go. But with one breath I released it all, and it was so freeing. Not only that, but my body settled more into the state of calm and bliss that I had been feeling since waking up. When you have experiences like that it’s easy to see how unneeded stress causes disease in the body, or dis-ease, as it’s often more accurately written in meditation literature.

This experience is no doubt the result of my yoga and meditation, but for now it’s only an isolated thing. As I practice more and more it’s inevitable that I’ll be able to have more and more experiences like this. When one becomes enlightened, which probably takes years and years of strict and disciplined practice, they are in that state continuously. Jon Kabat-Zinn, in Coming To Our Senses, uses the analogy of a dial-up vs. a DSL internet connection. Someone just starting out will “plug-in” to a mindful state from time-to-time, like a dial-up connection, but an enlightened person is always in that state in the same way that a DSL computer is always connected to the internet.

So during lunch today I may walk outside and hear someone talking about something that annoys me and not be able to get it out of my head. My connection will have been severed. Or it may happen tomorrow or the next day. But whenever I’m having issues I’m going to think back to that train ride and remember that non-attachment, one of the core teachings of both yoga and Buddhism, is what I need to exercise to free myself from harmful patterns of the mind.